Decluttering your “House”

M.O.B.A. Mentality
Aug 2
6 min read

How many times have you found your house to be a beautiful disaster? Bills scattered over countertops, dishes in the sink, the bathroom all sprawled out with cluttered toiletries and towels on the floor? The bedroom, a tornado of unfolded clothes and a living room that you cringe at when you walk by.

Unless you are Monica Geller, chances are you have lived in this mess at some point. Maybe you are reading this with your head down in shame because it’s what you are about to walk into when you get off of work today.

You walk into the house and sometimes you feel like you can’t even breath. It’s overwhelming, the mess that lies in every room. You keep replaying in your head the number of times you said that you are going to set time aside this weekend and knock it all out but you know DAMN well , that when the weekend comes, the mess is bigger and it pushes you further away from the task each time.

Then there’s that Saturday that comes along and you are motivated. Oh god, that fire was lit under your ass and you have woken up in in slay move, deciding that today is the day you are going to tackle it. Coffee is brewed and consumed, music is on and you are in beast mode!

You start in the kitchen. Water is hot, sleeves pushed back and you are doing dishes. Off to a great start. Bopping to the music and shaking that ass over the sink. Dishes are done and you are cleaning off the countertop. There's still so much more to do in there but you notice that there's bills piled everywhere. Those belong in the office. We are decluttering the kitchen so these bills need to go to the office right now!

We set them down on the desk in the office and notice that the desk is a disaster zone. Old post-it notes are collecting dust, pens scattered everywhere, papers sprawled out and cables are tangled. "Well fuck it," we say, "we are motivated, let’s just clean the desk real quick."

"How the fuck did eyeshadow end up on the desk?" Well, we can’t have that, we are on a mission, let’s move this to the bathroom right now before I lose momentum.

"Why are there so many clothes on the floor in the bathroom?" The toilet paper roll needs to be changed, there’s hair in the shower. Okay let’s start in the bathroom instead…

How many times has this scenario played out in your life? I know I can’t be the only one.

You started so motivated and then before you know it, it’s time for bed and you are absolutely exhausted as you feel you have been moving all day and yet not a single room is cleaned. And, in some cases, even more cluttered than before. Body is shutting down and yet the mess appears to have grown.

Now what if this scenario that has happened to you, can also be used as a metaphor for our life? Each room representing a different part of our life. There’s the relationship/partner room, the job room, the kids’ room, the family room, the finances room, the health room, the soul room, the mental health room, etc.

When we are cluttered in our lives with stresses piled on, it feels emotionally heavy like our bodies are filled with so much clutter in all of our rooms. It’s overwhelming, we can’t breathe, we feel suffocated in the chaos.

And then sometimes we wake up motivated and pumped to take control of our life and we decide to focus on one area of our life and we dive in both feet, but there’s a roadblock in the cleaning process because there's something there that belongs to another room and then we shift gears and then at the end of the day, we are mentally exhausted, emotionally drained, physically depleted and now we are more submersed in the negativity in our head than when we started.

"It's too much to handle. I can’t do this. I wish things were better. I wish there was a way to get a fresh start, a clean slate or have everything work my way the way I want to."

Then we spiral and the rooms pile up with more shit. And it’s an endless cycle we dive down.

But what if one day we decided to just focus on one room of our life at a time?

Yes, the messes of the other rooms will still be there, but we will have one safe haven to breathe and it might seem like it will take longer for the whole house to be cleaned but in reality it’s really all a matter of perception.

We spend months and years living in the chaos, the clutter, the shambles and the mess. We get inspired, flounder in overwhelmingness and then it could take 6 months or longer before we muster the strength to try and knock it out in a day.

But what if we just tackled one room in a day, maybe on Saturday? And then one room on Sunday? In less than a month, your house will be fully cleaned, organized and you will feel a huge weight lifted off of your shoulders.

But how do we do one room at a time when there’s always shit in each room that doesn’t belong there?

Easy, make a pile in a designated space.

Do not move from the kitchen.

If something belongs in the bathroom, set it aside and keep moving.

If something belongs in the office, set it aside and keep moving.

If something belongs in the bathroom, set it aside and keep moving.

Focus on what you have full control over. You have full control of each section of the room in that moment.

Come across something you haven’t used in years? Donate it or toss it. Why carry the mass of past shit that is irrelevant to you today? Why keep a reminder of an old version of yourself that no longer serves you today? Toss it and keep moving.

We are often bogged down by the weight of chatchkes and shit because we are afraid to let go and move forward from it. Why keep the metaphorical weight of non-serving items, people, emotions, thoughts and feelings today?

When you are done with the room, leave the random pile and save it for another day.

When you tackle the office, grab the office stuff in the pile and bring it in there and focus on that one room.

What you will notice is when you are tired after the day and you go into the kitchen for a snack and it’s clean and organized, you will feel 1000 times better, lighter, freer, and positive in your headspace. It brings you a little recharge before you go back to the room.

Our lives are made up of 100’s of different rooms that hold infinite particles of matter in them. Matter of the past, present and future. Matter that drains, uplifts, holds value, means nothing, etc. When we live in the clutter, we become incapable of having clear thoughts because it’s so clouded by random things at any given moment.

When the time comes and you are tired of living that way, you will light a fire under your ass, you will put the work in, but often find no reward or fruits of your labor.

Go get your reward one day at a time, one room at a time and when even that may seem daunting, one corner at a time.

When we shift our mindset to one element at a time and train ourselves to tune everything else out, you are amazed at how much more productive you are in life, how much more at peace you are in your life and how less chaotic it becomes.

For some of us, it takes years to get to this point. Took me 40 years and I still often find myself trying to tackle too many rooms at once.

But each day is a new day to change our fixed mindset and decide we are ready to grow and to level up.

What room are you focusing on today?